As I Look Behind


As I am standing in front of a very low, white wooden gate entrance on a narrow road, the thought that it looks as if it was build for children crossed my mind. I fix my eyes on the ground feeling the onyx color sending me a welcoming message and the peaceful atmosphere feels deep into my skin. I am thinking as well where the narrow road will take me if I were to move one step forward.

Doubtful, I am still standing in front of the gate until it occurs to me to look behind me. Suddenly I am remembering that once upon a time in a planet call Earth I used to live.

Yes! I remember Earth, is a little blue planet way down trillions and trillions of miles away… I see it spinning, I feel nostalgic. Funny, but I do not remember anything else. All I remember is that I used to exist once in the planet Earth.

I am so close yet so far away from Earth. I hold on to that thought, then, then I find myself navigating in the infinite blue ocean of space feeling the atoms that forms the ocean space deep within me, and the blue rays of light coming from the far, far away stars I sense are acknowledging me.

I am wondering to where is it that I want to go? Whoops! Am right back to where I was before: in front of the gate.

And I walked to the Heart of The Sun, or to a Castle in the Sun where every thing is made of crystal, crystal golden lights I must say. I am all by myself but I sense that I am not. I walk, and explore to see an exit somewhere, instead I found myself in the same place again and again… Lost in a castle of crystal golden lights.

Suddenly I remember my mother, and as I am remembering my mother and simultaneously the crystal lights in front of me are materializing into a hard crystal surfaced. To my amazement  my mother appeared in front of me! I run to embrace her but a hard crystal wall between us stopped us from embracing each other. My mother understands immediately why this is happening, so she walks away from me!

But she could not walk away from me; instead she starts to walk in the castle exploring it just as I did before.

Finally to no avail she stopped, and looking down to the surface floor and to our amazement, the immense, powerful Sun with its infinite shining rays of golden-yellow fire are under our feet! Yes we are on top of the Sun! Our thoughts keep crossing back and forth but we keep silence.

The gentle, magic Sun made every thing possible for us, it seems the Sun is like another planet. Those powerful, dangerous sunrays as I thought they were are simply reflections- golden lights reflections.

I am feeling honor to have such of privilege and the immense beauty I cannot comprehend. Actually I feel the urge to jump and navigate the depth of the infinite, gentle, golden ocean of lights but clearly that is not possible at the moment.

My mother and I stare above us now, and the sky is the limit, not a cloud- only oceans and oceans of infinite blue space fill with stars shining their life away… Not a thing to think about except to just be, be one with the ocean, Be One with all that is.






12 thoughts on “As I Look Behind”

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