As I Look Behind


As I am standing in front of a very low, white wooden gate entrance on a narrow road, the thought that the gate look as if it was build for children, crossed my mind.

I fix my eyes on the onyx ground, feeling the color sending me a welcoming message, and the peaceful atmosphere feels deep into my skin.

I am thinking as well, where the narrow road would take me if I were to move one step forward.

Doubtful, I am still standing in front of the gate until it occurs to me to look behind me. And suddenly I am remembering that once upon a time, in a planet call Earth I used to live.

Yes! I remember Earth. It is a little blue planet way down trillions of miles away… I can even see it spinning… and I feel nostalgic. Funny, but I do not remember anything else. All I remember is that I used to exist once on planet Earth, I am saying to myself.

I am so close, yet so far away from Earth. I hold on to that thought, then, then I find myself navigating within the infinite blue ocean that I call sky, feeling the atoms that forms the ocean deep within me, and the blue rays of light coming from the far, far away stars I sense are acknowledging me.

I am wondering to where is it that I want to go?

Whoops! Am right back to where I was before: in front of the gate.

And I walked to the heart of the Sun, or to a Castle in the Sun where every thing is made of crystal. Crystal golden lights I must say. I am all by myself but I sense that I am not. I am walking and exploring to see an exit somewhere but instead I found myself in the same place again and again… Lost in a castle of crystal golden lights.

Suddenly I remember my mother, and as I am remembering my mother, and simultaneously the crystal lights in front of me are materializing into a hard crystal surfaced. To my amazement, my mother appeared in front of me! I run to embrace her but a hard crystal wall between us stopped us from embracing each other. My mother understands immediately why this is happening, so she walks away from me!

But she could not walk away from me. Instead she starts walking in the castle exploring it just as I did before.

Finally to no avail she stopped, and looking down to the surface floor and to our amazement, the immense, powerful Sun with its infinite shining rays of golden-yellow gradient fire are under our feet!

Yes, we are on top of the Sun!

Our thoughts keep crossing back and forth but we keeps silence.

The gentle, magic Sun made every thing possible for us. It seems the Sun is like another planet, but it is not. Those powerful, dangerous sun-rays as I thought they were, are simply reflections.

They are golden lights reflections!

I am feeling honor having such of privilege, and the immense beauty I cannot comprehend. Actually, I feel the urge to jump and navigate the depth of the infinite, gentle, golden ocean of lights, but clearly that is not possible at the moment.

My mother and I stare above us now, and the sky is the limit! Not a cloud any where. Only oceans and oceans of infinite blue space filled with stars shining their lights away from where ever they may be.

Not a thing to think about except just be. Be one with the ocean. Be one with all that is.

~LFabre

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